


They Say Sex is a Killer... Do You Want to Die happy?

by Mod Bird Boy (Ninjaghoes)



Category: Lego Ninjago
Genre: M/M, Porn With Very Little Plot, Top Cole, bottom kai, lots of pick up lines and puns, they're having fun tho don't worry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2019-03-18 09:14:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13678713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ninjaghoes/pseuds/Mod%20Bird%20Boy
Summary: Kai tries to woo Cole with some sweet pick up lines. Cole's response? Eh, let's just say Kai got some dick. And puns. And an overall good time.





	They Say Sex is a Killer... Do You Want to Die happy?

“You must be one spicy dish because you’re making my heart burn.” Kai followed Cole down the hall, attempting to woo him in the only way he knew how.

“Go get an antacid, bro.” Cole offered casually as he shoved a handful of candy hearts in his mouth.

Kai paused to think. “Going on a date with me is WAY better than eating a bag of those weird, chalky heart candies with sayings on them.” 

“Yeah no, these are delicious.” Cole continued walking, paying no mind to the ninja behind him.

Kai stopped for a moment, considering what to say next. “Hey, Cole!” He shouted after the black ninja, receiving an uninterested hum in response. “Was your father an alien? Because there’s nothing else like you on Earth!”

Cole quickly spun around, eyes wide in shock. “Aliens? What do you know about that?”

“Uh, dude, it’s just a dumb pick up line.” Kai seemed confused, halting his steps.

“Aliens are not a joke, they are out there!” Cole squinted and lowered his voice to a whisper. “I’ve seen them.”

“Yeah, alright, alright.” Kai waved him off. “Look, I’ve been at this all day, can you give me a break and be swept off your feet already?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Cole’s expression changed to one of amusement as he moved towards Kai. “You’ll have to try a little harder than that.”

Kai raised an eyebrow before continuing. “I know a great way to burn off the calories in those candies you just ate.”

“Oh really?” Cole smirked, now interested.

The master of fire moved closer, speaking in the most seductive voice he could muster. “Kiss me if I’m wrong, but ghosts aren’t real.”

Cole caught Kai off guard, slamming him against the wall and pressing their lips together, dropping his bag of candy. Tongues quickly met, exploring one another. Kai softly groaned into the kiss, as his heart skipped a beat.

Cole pulled away, panting. “You and I both know that that wasn’t true.”

Kai laughed, out of breath. “That’s the point!” 

“Do you have a phone in your back pocket?” Cole grinned as he moved one hand to grab at the red ninja’s ass. “Because your booty is calling me.”

“Really? That’s all you got?” Kai challenged. “I love my bed but I’d rather be in yours.”

Cole attempted to sigh, but it came out as a chuckle. “Okay, that was pretty good.” He thought for a moment before returning. “I'm no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.”

“They say sex is a killer...” Kai spoke in a sultry tone. “Do you want to die happy?”

“That’s it.” Cole grabbed Kai and hoisted him into his arms. “We’re going.”

“Hey! It was just starting to get fun!” Kai complained, his cheeks flushed.

“Well, I swept you off your feet, so I’d say things are just getting started.” The black ninja replied in a husky voice as he walked to his room. Cole opened the door with his foot, leaving it open as he threw Kai onto the bed. 

Kai scoffed after landing. “You call this romantic?”

“Do you really want me to leave you here to go get some roses and candles?” Kai shook his head profusely. “Thought so.”

Cole crawled on to the bed, straddling Kai’s hips. He took note of their mutual arousal, but temporarily ignored it. Cole grabbed his partner’s wrists, holding them in place as he went in for another kiss. Right as they were about to pull away, Cole grinded his hips into Kais, eliciting a surprised moan. 

“C-Cole, what the hell!” Kai was quick to respond. 

Cole halted in his movements. “You want me to stop already?” The smirk was audible in his voice.

Kai thrusted his hips up, attempting to recreate the feeling. “Is that all you’ve got?” The challenge was then set.

The master of earth moved his legs, placing one in between Kai’s legs. He brought his partners hands together at the top of the bed, holding them in place with a single arm. The movements had caused Kai to shudder and grind against the leg in between his thighs.

Cole pushed Kai’s shirt up and ran a hand along his chest, taking time to play with each nipple, rolling it around in his fingers. He chuckled. “Your nipples are rock hard!” 

The red ninja felt his face heat up, but couldn’t help but grin at the joke. “Seriously?”

“You’re looking a little hot there. Almost… on fire.” Cole leaned down and locked lips with Kai, who giggled into the kiss. The laugh turned into moans quickly enough, as Cole moved his hand from Kai’s chest down to his hips. Legs spread to give easier access, allowing his hand to slip down under the pants and rub against the inner thighs of the fire master.

Cole removed his mouth and limbs once more, to get rid of their clothes. Kai took a deep breath and exhaled as he took off his shirt. Taking a moment to examine the scene before him, Kai found his mouth agape with wonder as he saw Cole’s naked figure. The two made eye contact, causing the brunette to regain himself and bite at his lower lip.

Cole took the chance and flexed. “Like what you see?” He posed and wiggled his eyebrows. 

Standing up, Kai went over to wrap his arms around Cole, their mouths meeting once more. The black ninja returned the kiss, wrapping his arms around Kai’s waist, as he let one hand slip down and grab his ass. 

Kai was the one to break the kiss. “I felt a burning desire.”

Cole let out a hearty laugh, before sighing. “I see pick-up lines aren’t your only forte!”

“What can I say? I’m great like that.” He grinned. “So how about we light this candle?” The two went to meet their lips once again, as Kai pulled his pants down.

“Hey, Cole, did you leave these on the floor because I swear-!” An awkward silence fell over the room as Jay entered, holding a half-empty bag of candy hearts. “Dude! Close the door next time!” Jay shielded his eyes.

“Seriously? You left the door open?” Kai’s mouth hung open in shock. “How did you forget the door!?”

“Hey, it’s not like you remembered it either!” Cole defended.

Jay grabbed the doorknob and chuckled uncomfortably. “Heh, I’ll just, uh, close this here door and, uh…” The door clicked shut and they could hear footsteps running away.

“Tsk, way to kill the mood, dirt-bag.” Kai crossed his arms.

“Well, I don’t see your flame getting extinguished over here.” Cole smiled smugly, looking down at the brunette’s erection before turning around. The lube was always kept in his bedside drawer, which was what he went to get. Kai went to sit back onto the bed as Cole turned back around, lube in hand. “Let’s try this again.”

The red ninja nodded as Cole sat down next to him. The two leaned into another kiss, their tongues meeting. Cole moved them lower onto the bed, setting the lubricant down next to him. He continued until he was on top of Kai, as he moved his hands to his partner’s hips.

The master of earth pulled himself away, panting softly. He climbed off and on to the floor, where he pulled Kai towards him by his ankles. “We’ll need a lock, for sure.” He began to kiss up and down Kai’s thighs, taking short moments to nibble and suck at certain spots, causing the brunette to groan quietly. “Maybe make the room soundproof.” 

Cole picked the lube back up, squirting a generous amount into his hand. He began preparing Kai, one finger at a time. Kai shifted a little, seeming uncomfortable. Cole quickly fixed that up, as he placed his mouth on the other’s member while the next digit slipped in.

While Kai would never admit it, he tends to be quite vocal during such acts. The second that Cole’s mouth touched his cock, his arousal hit him. Hard. Kai’s mouth opened as he almost forgot how to breathe. 

Cole stretched out the opening as well as he could, maneuvering his fingers in a way that caused the master of fire to groan. He quickly pulled them out and stood up, using the excess lube to prepare his own cock before replacing his hand.

Kai arched his back, gasping. It had been an almost foreign sensation to him, though it was not entirely alien. Once fully entered, both ninja paused to adjust to the feeling.

“You ready?” Cole asked, getting a nod in response. He took a deep breath before he began to move, slamming in and out of Kai, who found himself almost lost in feeling.

“C-Cole!” Kai cried out, following up with whimpers. “Harder!”

Cole began to quicken his pace, going in ruthlessly, as he held his partner in place. He gasped and grunted, every movement causing new sensations. 

“Is this the b-best you can do?” The brunette taunted, gasping as Cole began to hit all the right places. He could feel the cock rubbing against his prostate, gliding along it every time it entered. 

“Y’know,” Cole grunted. “You sure make a lot of demands for someone – hah – with a dick up their ass!” 

Kai didn’t respond verbally, electing to pull himself up to attempt a kiss. Cole assisted, putting a hand on his back, leading their lips together. The red ninja took the opportunity to wrap his arms around his partner’s neck, as he held on tightly.

Cole began to thrust as hard as he could, he reached his limit. He groaned as he spilled his seed into Kai, slowing his movements, but continuing to finish Kai off.

“A-Ah! Cole!” The new angle had allowed more comfort and more pleasure, as Kai was nearing his edge. He hummed as he came, releasing onto the both of them, riding out his orgasm on Cole’s cock. 

The two paused to catch their breath. Cole pulled out, his cum dripping off his dick. Kai allowed himself to collapse on the bed, exhausted.

Cole grabbed a towel off his floor, using it to clean them both up as the brunette spoke. “Next time, I’m on top.”

“Yeah, right.” The black ninja laughed breathlessly. He pulled Kai back up to meet their lips once more, both smiling into the kiss. They separated and Cole grinned. “Maybe one day.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments are always appreciated!


End file.
